Dogs and Turtles and Porcupines

Many are the pets I have had, mostly dogs. I have had dogs and cats and turtles and snakes and fish and hamsters. Never had a porcupine, and know of no one who has. The animal companions I like the most are dogs.

Many are the people I have known and learned from and taught with and cared for and avoided. I deeply believe that all humans are precious and flawed. I believe we should honor the preciousness and forgive the flaws. With some folks, that is more difficult. And I grow weary of dividing folks into dichotomies, black or white, good or bad, sinner or saint, giver or taker, Mars or Venus. Hence, a metaphorical trichotomy: dogs and turtles and porcupines.

The dogs I have known and loved are without guile. If you are lucky enough to be chosen by a dog as a member of his or her pack, then you will receive great blessings. No matter what you do or say, the dog will forgive you. In fact, if you grow angry at your dog, he or she will approach you, wagging tail, licking face, doing tricks to get you to like him or her again. Dogs can be stubborn and obstinate and set in their ways. Your loving obedient dog will take off as demon possessed should they see a cat or a squirrel or your new pair of shoes, forgetting you entirely in pursuit of their own instincts. But if they love you and you return that love they will be man or woman’s best friend. They will protect you, they will come to you when you hurt, they seek your approval always, forgive you no matter what you do and seek your forgiveness no matter what they do. I have sat alone and cried only to be aroused from my stuporous pout by the wet nose, wagging tail and long wet tongue of my dog, seeking to make me better.

Turtles are really weird creatures, all hard shall, leathery exterior and very soft insides. I had a couple of pet box turtles, found in the yard when I was a youngster. Their hawkish face, beady eyes and silly little tails always warmed my heart. But, I expected less and received less from a turtle. Turtles come equipped for defensive posture. They take care of themselves first. When threatened they retreat into a shell, depriving us of even a hint of their interior. I could not turn to my turtle for solace. I could thump its shell and watch it retreat. My turtles were unforgiving because they are designed for self defense and have only their own survival in mind. I know there are species of turtles that are aggressive, but your basic box turtle stumbles along seeking to gratify its own needs, and quickly withdraws allowing its incredibly hard exterior to protect it from all things without. I grew quickly bored with my pet turtles. They have great, hard boundaries. No matter how much I cared for them or held them or talked to them, they always sought their own gratification and retreated from me when I wanted to interact. If you want a companion, turtles are not a good choice.

I really know very little about porcupines, and that is OK. What I do know is that to even pet one is extremely painful. Their bodies covered in bristly quills speak volumes: stay away, do not touch, do not approach or I will hurt you. I cannot imagine a cuddly porcupine. They must mate, but I expect there is little foreplay. I see them as solitary mammals, rooting in the dirt, living a lonely bristly life. I wonder if they feel lonely or hurt, but that is just an anthropomorphism.

I am sure you are well ahead of my keyboard. You and I know people who tend to be more like dogs or turtles or porcupines. Dogs like other dogs and run in packs. Dogs like humans too. However, if a dog and a turtle become friends, the dog will eventually feel rejected and try harder to win over the turtle, while the turtle will retreat further and further into its shell. No one is friends with a porcupine, those folks who bristle at the first approach, who always seem angry and avoid affection and friendship at all costs. Two turtles could get along, but always apart. Turtles and porcupines make an interesting couple, the porcupine always bristling and turtle always in his or her shell. I know couples like that.

I see people as a combination of these animals, capable of the behavior of each, but with a tendency toward one. I guess we are all dogurtlepines. I think I am more dog-like. My dearest friends are dog-like as well. I have good friends who are more turtle-like. I avoid folks who are more porcupine-like. When I am threatened in a relationship I wag my tail, do tricks, and beg. That works with other dogs, not always with people. At first my defenses are down, my boundaries are shot and I have no turtle-like self-protective shell. Eventually I grow weary of the offer of affection, the lack of response, and the rejection and become turtle-like withdrawing while resisting the urge to become a porcupine.

I think porcupine people may need dog people in their lives the most, but will not allow it to happen. I think turtle people want to be close to dog people, but are afraid of what that means so they remain covered and protected unwilling to stick their necks out. We dog-people just keep running around, wagging our tails and hoping someone will pet us in return for our devotion.

Woof, woof!