Always Different

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 9, 2011



I putted off to Houston for a hair appointment Saturday. (A gal has to keep up appearances, though the whole notion of, "Beauty is pain," dissolves at a certain age. Ah, give me warmth, give me comfort.) Roads clear, skies deep blue, and after being virtually house-bound by ice for a couple of days, I was feeling really expansive in the great outdoors, burning gallons of petrol cruising along with my neighbors on the blacktop, gazing fondly at the shimmering white of Canadian geese on the desolate rice fields. My radio is always on NPR and I was just hooting with Click and Clack, the Tappet Brothers on "Car Talk" when a female caller from Taos, New Mexico, made a disparaging aside about her husband that almost landed me in the ditch: "When you are looking for Mr. Right, be sure his first name isn't Always."

Always Right. That is as good a name as Eileen Good.

Perhaps you have heard this expression, but as I first heard it I was touched on so many levels I was near breathless. While I laughed hysterically, I began to sense a deep inner sadness. I know Mr. Always Right. I feel sorry for him when I am alone, and feel sorry for me when I am with him. In fact, I know his sister by the same name. This character is not gender specific, but he/she is all around us.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about the difference in pursuing improvement and defending perfection. Folks that pursue improvement are always learning, asking, reading, thinking, probing, trying new things. Folks who now know all they care to know are always telling, always preaching, always judging. If one has arrived at perfection, and something goes wrong, it must be someone else's fault. Can't be me. I'm perfect. So, if something goes awry, it must be you because I can defend my perfection. I am Always Right.

Funny how a lot of teachers end up in this spot. So do a lot of administrators, a lot of legislators, a lot of talk show pundits. And, I guess to be honest, a lot of bloggers. When I slip into being AR, rather than listening I begin to think about my defensive response during your monologue. But , I pat myself on the back as I blog, tweet, and Blackberry at my ripe age. I am still learning.

None of us are always right. I have an opinion and an attitude. The world makes sense to me as I view it through my opinion and attitude. I am a liberal. I am a Christian. I think the planet is warming and that we are contributing to it. I think science advances us. I think we will figure out how not to blow ourselves up or die of thirst, or drown in rising tides. I think those who have a lot have a responsibility to those who do not. I think governments exist to resolve conflicts and provide services that we cannot do alone. I think each and every human is both flawed and precious. I think we should be boldly going where no one has gone before. I am a bleeding heart and likely will be until my heart stops pumping. I think materialism may do us in, but confess I like my material comforts and lust for more. But Lord I hope that when data, knowledge, opportunity, or insight arrives at my door that just doesn't fit in my current schema, I have the good sense to learn and move on. I figure if Zeus appeared at the foot of my bed and asked why I was persecuting him, I would have to re-think my faith.

Gladly, to date, I have not seen Zeus nor spoken with him. So, for me today, I guess I am right. Therefore, the same must be true for you. And so I wonder and celebrate that we all share this planet and are Always Right, and are Always Different! Must be OK to be different.

Listening to each other really helps, though.